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five essays:
Personal Essay
Three times a week after school I go visit my
dad. When I enter the hospital room where he has lain in a coma since his accident, my
eyes often wander to the lone golf ball my mom placed at his bedside. Just six months ago,
my father was driving a golf cart across the street that bisects the local golf course
when he was hit by a car. He suffered severe brain injury, and the doctors have ruled out
any possibility of him waking up again. When I look at him lying in bed, frail but
peaceful as if he were asleep, it's hard not to dwell on the "what ifs": what if
he hadn't played golf that day? What if he hadn't been behind the fence when the black
Camry plowed into it? What if I still had the chance to ask all those questions that choke
me up when I see him in the hospital? I can't pretend that I have developed enough
distance from the event to draw conclusions about life, but I am already beginning to see
myself in very different terms.
Ironically, through this accident my dad has
given a chance to face reality head-on. Before the accident, my relationship with him was
warm but fraught with tension. He never seemed satisfied with what I did and reprimanded
me for every wrong step I took. He had strong opinions about my hairstyle, clothes,
friends, and--above everything else--my academic performance. When I was not sitting at my
desk in my room, he invariably asked me why I had nothing to do and told me I should not
procrastinate. He stressed that if I missed my teenage years of studying, I would regret
it later. He didn't like me going out with my friends, so I often ended up staying at
home--I was never allowed to sleep over at other students' homes. All I remember from my
past high school years is going to school and coming back home. I was confused by my
parents' overprotective attitude, because they emphasized independence yet never actually
gave me a chance to be independent.
In terms of career, my dad often lectured me
about which ones are acceptable and which are not. He worried incessantly about whether I
would ever get into college, and he often made me feel as if he would never accept my
choices. Rather than standing up for myself, I simply assumed that if I studied hard, he
would no longer be disappointed in me. Although I tried hard, I never seemed to get it
quite right; he always found fault with something. As if that weren't enough, he
frequently compared me to my over-achieving older brother, asking me why I couldn't be
more like him. I must admit that at times I even questioned whether my dad really loved
me. After all, he never expressed admiration for what I did, and my attempts to impress
him were always in vain.
In retrospect, I don't think I fully
understood what he was trying to tell me. These days, when I come home to an empty house,
it strikes me just how dependent on my parents' care and support I have been so far. Now
that my dad is in the hospital and my mom is always working, I see that I must develop the
strength to stand alone one day. And, for the very first time, I now realize that this is
exactly what my dad was trying to make me see. I understand that he had a big heart, even
though he didn't always let it show; he was trying to steer me in the right direction,
emphasizing the need to develop independence and personal strength. He was trying to help
me see the world with my own eyes, to make my own judgments and decide for myself what I
would eventually become. When my dad was still with us, I took all of his advice the wrong
way. I should not have worried so much about living up to my parents' expectations; their
only expectation of me, after all, is that I be myself.
In mapping out my path to achieving my
independence, I know that education will allow me to build on the foundations with which
my parents have provided me. My academic interests are still quite broad, but whereas I
was once frustrated by my lack of direction, I am now excited at the prospect of exploring
several fields before focusing on a particular area. Strangely, dealing with my father's
accident has made me believe that I can tackle just about any challenge. Most importantly,
I am more enthusiastic about my education than ever before. In embarking on my college
career, I will be carrying with me my father's last gift and greatest legacy: a new desire
to live in the present and the confidence to handle whatever the future might bring.
Story Essay
I walked into the first class
that I have ever taught and confronted utter chaos. The four students in my Latin class
were engaged in a heated spitball battle. They were all following the lead of Andrew, a
tall eleven-year-old African-American boy.
Andrew turned to me and said, "Why are we
learning Latin if no one speaks it? This a waste of time."
I broke out in a cold sweat. I thought,
"How on Earth am I going to teach this kid?"
It was my first day of Summerbridge, a
nationwide collaborative of thirty-six public and private high schools. Its goal is to
foster a desire to learn in young, underprivileged students, while also exposing college
and high-school students to teaching. Since I enjoy tutoring, I decided to apply to the
program. I thought to myself, "Teaching can't be that difficult. I can handle
it." I have never been more wrong in my life.
After what seemed like an eternity, I ended
that first class feeling as though I had accomplished nothing. Somehow I needed to catch
Andrew's attention. For the next two weeks, I tried everything from indoor chariot races
to a Roman toga party, but nothing seemed to work.
During the third week, after I had exhausted
all of my ideas, I resorted to a game that my Latin teacher had used. A leader yells out
commands in Latin and the students act out the commands. When I asked Andrew to be the
leader, I found the miracle that I had been seeking. He thought it was great that he could
order the teacher around with commands such as "jump in place" and "touch
the window." I told him that if he asked me in Latin to do something, I would do it
as long as he would do the same. With this agreement, I could teach him new words outside
the classroom, and he could make his teacher hop on one foot in front of his friends.
Andrew eventually gained a firm grasp of Latin.
Family night occurred during the last week of
Summerbridge. We explained to the parents what we had accomplished. At the conclusion,
Andrew's mom thanked me for teaching him Latin. She said, "Andrew wanted to speak
Latin with someone, so he taught his younger brother."
My mouth fell open. I tempered my immediate
desire to utter, "Andrew did what?" I was silent for a few seconds as I tried to
regain my composure, but when I responded, I was unable to hide my surprise.
That night I remembered a comment an English
teacher had made to me. I had asked her, "Why did you become a teacher?"
She responded with a statement that perplexed
me at the time. She said, "There is nothing greater than empowering someone with the
love of knowledge." Now, I finally understood what she meant.
When I returned to Summerbridge for my second
summer, the first words out of Andrew's mouth were, "Is there going to be a Latin
class this year?"
Detail Essay
I close my eyes and can still
hear her, the little girl with a voice so strong and powerful we could hear her halfway
down the block. She was a Russian peasant who asked for money and in return gave the only
thing she had--her voice. I paused outside a small shop and listened. She brought to my
mind the image of Little Orphan Annie. I could not understand the words she sang, but her
voice begged for attention. It stood out from the noises of Arbat Street, pure and
impressive, like the chime of a bell. She sang from underneath an old-style lamppost in
the shadow of a building, her arms extended and head thrown back. She was small and of
unremarkable looks. Her brown hair escaped the bun it had been pulled into, and she
occasionally reached up to remove a stray piece from her face. Her clothing I can't
recall. Her voice, on the other hand, is permanently imprinted on my mind.
I asked one of the translators about the girl.
Elaina told me that she and hundreds of others like her throughout the former Soviet Union
add to their families' income by working on the streets. The children are unable to attend
school, and their parents work fulltime. These children know that the consequence of an
unsuccessful day is no food for the table. Similar situations occurred during the
Depression in the United States, but those American children were faceless shoeshine boys
of the twenties. This girl was real to me.
When we walked past her I gave her money. It
was not out of pity but rather out of admiration. Her smile of thanks did not interrupt
her singing. The girl watched us as we walked down the street. I know this because when I
looked back she smiled again. We shared that smile, and I knew I would never forget her
courage and inner strength. She was only a child, yet was able to pull her own weight
during these uncertain times. On the streets of Moscow, she used her voice to help her
family survive. For this "Annie," there is no Daddy Warbucks to come to the
rescue. Her salvation will only come when Russia and its people find prosperity.
Personal Growth Essay
Tom Zincer succeeded in his
task. My science class's first field trip took place on a bitter cold February day in
Maine. Tom, our science teacher, led the group of relatively puzzled, well-bundled
students into the forest. I was right behind Tom, and the sound of his red boots breaking
through the thin layer of ice that covered the crusty snow seemed to bounce off the trees
and scare away the few singing birds that had not migrated south for the winter. We
stopped fourteen times during that four-hour field trip to hear Tom ramble on about the
bark of "this" deciduous tree and the habitat that "this" coniferous
tree needs to grow. We examined animal droppings and tracks in the snow and traced a
bird's song back to its singer. This was all meaningless to me. I was cold and bored and
wanted the field trip to end.
I would later write several essays in my
journal about the fact that writing a detailed seven-page analysis of the field trip took
all the beauty out of the event. I would complain to Tom about how boring and mundane his
class was and how impossible it was to be so "anally" observant. I argued that
no field trip could ever be enjoyable if we had to write down and later analyze the
percentage of deciduous and coniferous trees, the air temperature, the amount of snow on
the ground, the slope of the course taken, the change in temperature over the day, and a
plethora of other minutia. Basically, I was lazy. No, no. I was not lazy. I was just not
ready; I was not yet ready to become an observer.
"Sam, just trust me on this one. You'll
thank me later," Tom said at the conclusion of our meeting. I had gone to see Tom
privately in order to discuss how I could survive his class. The minutia was killing me,
and my slow death was reflected in my dismal grade. Upon leaving that meeting, I made a
personal and academic decision to develop my observational skills, both to please my
teacher and to avoid the disappointment of another "D+."
On my next field trip, I set out into the
forest with two pencils cocked between my two ears like guns ready to fire. My teeth were
clenched with the determination to stay focused throughout the entire field trip and write
down every word that man uttered. However, I constantly felt myself drifting, and while my
mind wandered, the group advanced significantly ahead of me, and I missed the sighting of
another bird. I ran up to the group just in time to hear Tom start his lecture about a
nearby rock formation. Instead of listening, I was asking my friend to see his
Picasso-like rendition of the bird. I, therefore, fell behind on the lecture, and so went
the endless cycle: fall behind, try to catch up, fall more behind. When it came time to
rewrite my field notes in legible form, I stared at a piece of paper that consisted of
smudged squiggly lines and eventually tears. Frustrated and disappointed, I retreated back
to my cabin to seek refuge.
I quickly got undressed and slipped under my
blanket for warmth, comfort, and most importantly protection. After I gave myself a few
minutes to calm down, I took out the wet crumbled piece of paper from my pocket and tried
to redraw a stick figure of a bird. The twelve stick figures, representing the twelve
different birds we saw, looked exactly the same, and trying to redraw each body part of
each bird to scale was so difficult that I felt like each pen stroke was met with a ton of
resistance. Giving up, I pushed the piece of paper back into my pocket and lay down on my
back. I saw Simon sitting in his characteristically feminine position on Ethan's bed.
Simon was sitting, facing Ethan, with his legs crossed and his right hand casually nestled
on his right kneecap, his foot twitching like the tail of a happy dog. Ethan was lying on
his side with his big black headphones cupped around his ears, reading Faulkner. As my
head swiveled, I noticed Conrad, sleeping, as usual, with his blanket clenched tightly
under his chin, with both fists. I heard Fred and Rob discussing the pitfalls of modern
education and could see Donald's head rhythmically moving back and forth, in sync with
Jimi Hendrix. I then realized that I too was part of my environment. I realized that I was
a silent participant, and more importantly, I realized that I was an observer.
On my next field trip, I had one pencil
nonchalantly nestled on top of my right ear. I set out with no mission in mind and had no
vengeance in my heart. I intentionally lagged behind my fellow classmates in order to get
a wider, broader perspective of the environment. Applying what I learned in my cabin, I
was able to engage all of my senses and could attempt to take in the vastness of it all.
When we returned from our field trip, the task of doing a "rewrite" did not seem
so odious, and my pencil flew across the page like a writer who just experienced an
epiphany and wants to get his idea down before he forgets it. I drew every bird, tree, and
rock as best I could, and although they were not perfect, they were exactly what I saw.
Hobbies and Interests Essay
The sun is still asleep while the empty city
streets await the morning rush hour. As in a ritual, my teammates and I assemble into the
dank, dimly-lit locker room at the Rinconada Park Pool. One by one, we slip into our moist
drag suits and then make a mad run from the locker room through the brisk morning air to
the pool, stopping only to grab a pull-buoy and a kick-board. Coastal California cools
down overnight to the high forties. The pool is artificially warmed to seventy-nine
degrees, and the clash in temperatures creates a plethora of steam on the water's surface,
casting a scene more appropriate for a werewolf movie. Now the worst part: diving
head-first into the glacial pond. I think of friends still tucked in their warm beds as I
conclude the first warm-up laps. Meanwhile, our coach emerges through the fog. He offers
no friendly accolades, just a stream of instructions and exhortations.
Thus begins another workout. 4,500 yards to
go, then a quick shower and five-minute drive to school. Another 5,500 yards are on our
afternoon training schedule. Tomorrow, the cycle starts all over again. The objective is
to cut our times by another 1/10th of second. The end goal is to have that tiny difference
at the end of a race that separates success from failure, greatness from mediocrity.
Somehow we accept the pitch--otherwise, we'd still be fast asleep beneath our blankets.
Yet sleep is lost time, and in this sport time is the antagonist. Coaches spend hours in
specialized clinics, analyzing the latest research on training techniques and
experimenting with workout schedules in an attempt to unravel the secrets of defeating
time.
My first swimming race was when I was ten
years old and an avid hockey player. My parents, fearing that I would get injured,
redirected my athletic direction toward swimming. Three weeks into my new swimming
endeavor, I somehow persuaded my coach to let me enter the annual age group meet. To his
surprise and mine, I pulled out an "A" time. National "Top 16" awards
through the various age groups, club records, and finally being named a National First
Team All-American in the 100 Butterfly and Second Team All-American in the 200-Medley
Relay cemented an achievement in the sport. Reaching the Senior Championship meet series
means the competition includes world-class swimmers. Making finals will not be easy from
here: these 'successes' were only separated from failure by tenths of a second. And the
fine line between total commitment and tolerance continues to produce friction. Each new
level requires more weight training, longer weekend training sessions, and more travel.
Time that would normally be spent with friends is increasingly spent in pursuit of the
next swimming objective.
In the solitude of the laps, my thoughts
wander to events of greater significance. This year, my grandmother was hit with a
recurrence of cancer, this time in her lungs. A person driven by good spirits and
independence now faces a definite timeline. On the other side of the Pacific Ocean, my
grandfather in Japan also contracted the disease. His situation has been corrected with
surgery--for now, anyway. In the quest to extend their lives, they have both exhibited a
strength that surpasses the struggles I confront both in sports and in life. Our different
goals cannot be compared, yet my swimming achievements somehow provide a vicarious sense
of victory to them. When I share my latest award or partake with them a story of a
triumph, they smile with pride as if they themselves had stood on the award stand. I have
the impression that my medals mean more to them than I will ever understand.
Life's successes appear to come in small
increments, sometimes mere tenths of a second. A newly learned skill, a little extra
effort put on top of fanatical training routine, a good race day, or just showing up to a
workout when your body and psyche say "no" may separate a great result from a
failure. What lies in between is compromise, the willpower to overcome the natural
disposition to remain the same. I know that my commitment to swimming carries on to other
aspects of life, and I feel that these will give me the strength to deal with very
different types of challenges.
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